RECOGNIZING TRAUMAS

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Some youths are unable to recognize traumas in their lives because they have been conditioned to believe that these are normalities. This makes it important to understand exactly what trauma entails before beginning to identify such events in your life.

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Emotional and psychological trauma can be a recent event or a childhood experience. There are several symptoms of trauma which include but are not limited to helplessness, anxiety, distrustfulness, emotional numbness and disconnectedness. (Robinson, Smith & Segal, 2017) Trauma is the result of a single serious or ongoing stressful event that often makes you feel helpless and terrorized. These events can threaten your safety, but can also leave you feeling emotionally overwhelmed without causing physical harm. (Fratto, 2016) Some forms of trauma and abuse that many foster youth have reported from their guardians and individuals in custodial roles include getting kicked, hit, slapped, thrown, pushed, beaten, abandoned, choked, smothered, strangled, tied up and/or blindfolded, deprived of food, deprived medical treatment, attacked with a weapon and raped. (Child Welfare Policy Brief, 2016) These forms of abuse cause physical harm but abuse can also be verbal and cause the same emotional and psychological trauma.

Once you have a clear understanding of the symptoms of trauma and events that cause it, you can begin to identify these traumas in your life. Unresolved traumatic issues have been proven to cause chronic adverse reactions throughout your lifetime making it important to face these burdens so that you can release their hold on your life. (Fratto, 2016) Your first goal is to identify a pivotal traumatic event that you experienced which continues to affect you today. For some, this might be the first time you experienced physical or verbal abuse from someone you loved. Others might say it was the moment they were removed from their home and put in the foster care system. No answer is wrong, and maybe you can immediately recognize several traumatic moments. It might be beneficial to identify a smaller, less traumatic event before tackling a more impactful one. If you feel uncomfortable with this, practice with a trusted mentor or counselor present so that you are not alone. The purpose of this exercise is for you to acknowledge the reality of these events instead of ignoring them. No one promised it would be easy or painless, but it is necessary so that you can move beyond these traumas.
 

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BURDENING EMOTIONS

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Now that you have identified a traumatic event (or several), you should then focus on how this makes you feel. This step is often the hardest. The goal in this step is not to work through your emotions or resolve them (we will cover this in the counseling discipline), but to merely give yourself the opportunity to react to the traumas you have experienced and feel whatever emotions that directly resulted from this event. A few examples of emotions you may feel are anger, betrayal, or sadness. These are all very real and justified emotions and you deserve the opportunity to feel this way so that you do not repress these feelings. It may seem easier to ignore the emotions or stifle them, but this is dangerous because you are left with unresolved inner conflicts that will reveal themselves in your future. Again, you might practice this with a trusted mentor or counselor because this step can often be the most overwhelming. If you don’t feel as if you have someone in your life, please reach out to RLA and we will connect you with someone! This is not something you can accomplish in a single day, but it is a practice that occurs over time and eventually you will recognize emotional relief as you unburden yourself from the weight of these traumas. 

If you now recognize that you are in an abusive or neglectful situation, please reach out to RLA or a trusted mentor. We are here to guide you to resources and professionals who are committed to the safety of youth. Staying in a situation of abuse and neglect can cause you traumas and stresses that no one deserves to face. We are here to listen. We are here to help. You are not alone!